This week has been exceptionally hard on Luke. I have the absolute luxury of having 3 months off in the summer, and while the transition to me just going back to teach st the community college 7 weeks ago was difficult for Luke, this week, going back to teach at the university and adding 20 more hours away from him has been really difficult. He’s been attached to my hip, barely letting me out of his sight, even to go into the kitchen to make dinner. He’s had a particularly hard time in preschool, where the teacher told me that Tuesday was a really difficult day for him and then Thursday, he cried harder than he has in the past when I took him to school and my sister said that when she and my mom went to pick Luke up, he was sitting at the table, eating lunch, and crying. Furthermore, the past few nights, he woken up several times, crying, and screaming–yes, actually screaming– “mama.”
I cannot even describe how terrible this is making me feel.
Tonight was his night to spend with his dad, but I sent my ex an email, explaining what was going on and that I believed Luke needed some extra mama time and more reassurance than normal that “mama” is here, and that I would greatly appreciate me keeping Luke tonight to make him feel the security he obviously needs right now.
Thankfully my ex agreed to let Luke stay home with me.
Since I only teach from 9-noon on Fridays, we had a lot of time to cuddle, take a nap together, play, and spend the evening reading books.
As I look at Luke, asleep and snuggled so closely to me right now, I’m so thankful I for my extra mama time right now. Luke needed to be with me, and I certainly needed to have him close to me as well.